Going for Goal

Take the time to write your goals out, to really put your vision out in the world in a concrete way.  Then, supermoms, watch those goals come to fruition!

"Can't" Just Won't

Telling yourself you can't do something, even if it's a whispered phrase in the back of your mind, really won't do anything for you, supermoms.  Be your own promoter with encouragements that you CAN!

Oils for Living

As far back as the pharoahs, essential oils were highly valued commodities, so much so that often they were stolen from graves and tombs right along with other treasures like precious stones and minerals.  They were held in such high regard for their healing and therapeutic powers that the three wise men came baring them as gifts to the baby Jesus (frankincense, myrrh).

In my quest for good health, I've begun using essential oils as a resource for cold prevention (citrus blend), healing the endless stream of cuts, scrapes, and bruises (maleleuca), and deeper relaxation for stress points and during massages and baths (lavendar).  While I haven't found them to a be an instant cure-all, they do seem to have an impact without leaving me feeling like we're left with nothing but popping pain pills or taking dose after dose of cold medicine...a more natural weapon to have in the arsenal of family health!

There is a great site (and an app, too!) that lists oil "recipes" for whatever your ailment or need from acne to cellulite (lemon) to stuffy noses (peppermint):

http://everythingessential.me/

Build up your daily health regimen to include some help from this natural but powerful resource!

A Healing Reunion

One of the big reasons health has become so important to me is that I spent the better part of my early years as an inactive, plump girl.  Like many of us, I suppose, I really had no idea who I was or what I was capable of.  I think this insecurity did little to draw friends my way or to endear me to many of my classmates.  I was either ignored or teased, not as bad as some but worse than others.  Still, the scars I earned in the halls of my junior high and high schools were things I carried with me for years after, letting them define me.

Then, my children were born, and with their unconditional love and the constant love and adoration of my husband, I FINALLY blossomed!  Secure in my place in the world, I decided I could brave my 20-year high school reunion.  This is a mile-stone event that I did not want to miss, so I steeled myself for what I was certain would be an awkward night of being the wallflower and outcast I'd been the last time I'd seen these people.  I even talked my husband into going with me as a safety net!

All the deeply buried scars boiled to the surface, as I stepped into the event.  I was nervous and anxious!  Low and behold, it became an evening of the fondest of reunions with old friends, long-lost buddies, and classmates that seemed to be in as much disbelief about how we'd all changed as I was!  With name tags featuring our Senior pictures, the night became a fun game of rectifying the photo to the person...the former queens now in glasses, the stoners now confident business men, the athletes now with the growing paunch of middle-age, and the nerds now glowing with confidence and strength!  I was so excited for everyone and to hear their stories, and I was shocked to find that they felt the same about me!

For this former outsider, it was like a spiritual healing...my wounded teeny-bopper finally being welcomed by her peers.  Perhaps one of the most memorable moments was standing next to one of the most popular boys of our class and having him do a double-take, as he compared me to my photo mid-way through our conversation.  In the most sincerest way, he said, "wow, look at you, you're so beautiful!".  Me?  As we talked more about our lives, he then said one of the best statements.."it took me a long time to figure out who I am".  It looks like we weren't all that different after all.  So, I went home that evening filled with the sheer joy of connecting with this small group of people that I have the most unique of bonds, and feeling my inner teeny-bopper's scars fade, especially in the face of her shining smile!

Stick To It-ness

When I hear a whiny "I've tried everything" from moms, anyone really, struggling with their weight, I say "that means you've never really stuck with anything".  Consider that, supermoms.  Lifestyle changes don't happen overnight and certainly not without a little blood, sweat, and/or tears.  Figure out a nutrition and exercise plan, and for heaven's sake, stick with it!

Sum of Our Fears

So, let's address the elephant in the room...fear!  So many of us are held back by our fear.  It keeps us in check, keeps us complacent, and keeps us for going after those big dreams.  What are some of your fears?  You know, those things that cross your mind that make you feel anxious, your heart starts pounding, then your palms start to sweat.  Let's get them out on the table.  If you are aware of them, you can face them, supermoms!  I'll start:  not fitting in, not being good enough, needles, heights, and failure, failure, failure!

But some wise person said something like "out of great moments of fear comes great courage".  So,  time to fess up.  Share your list.  Write it down.  Work on facing it down!

K-I-S-S-i-n-g

I hear so often from other moms that they just can't seem to find time in the day to focus on themselves, and it truly drives me crazy!  I can't tell you when and where, but there IS time in your day for YOU.  Want to know how to find it, then try KISSing!  Keep It Simple, Supermoms!  Declutter the noise in your life and downsize on some activities.  Focus on what you want or need to do for you, rather than trying to live up to someone else's expectations, and learn to say "no", instead of signing on for an unfulfilling project or committee because you feel like you should.  Slowly, you'll whittle away some free time here and bit more there, and the next thing you know...viola!  Time makes itself available for you to meditate for a few, 30-minutes is open for a run or walk, you can sit down and read a few pages in some spicy new novel, work a bit more on a beloved craft project, or even meet a dear friend for coffee without being rushed.  Simplify!

With a Nay-Nay Here and a Nay-Nay There

Got naysayers, supermoms?  You know, the types that are scattered around the sidelines of you life shouting words of discouragement at you, while you're working towards a goal line.  Notice that they are involved only from the safety of the sidelies, rather than risking being in the game with you?  Try to turn a deaf ear and listen for your cheerleaders...those that are jumping up and down for you at all phases of your journey to wellbeing.  And, don't forget to focus in on your team of supporters, working right there beside you to get you to your goals.  Let their words carry you through!

Good Enough

Highschool bullies and unobtainable-beauty platforms be damned!  After spending so much of my life uncomfortable and self-concious, this supermom has finally found some peace in her own skin.  Maybe it's part of aging.  Maybe it's a reflection of the love and support around me.  Maybe it's a product of the effort and work I've put into caring for myself that has helped me to better accept myself.  Whatever it is, it sure feels good to be enough!  Sending wishes for the same to all of you supermoms out there.  Mmmwah, my lovelies!

In Resolution

Happy New Year, supermoms!  It's the start of another, which usually means the drafting of a new list of resolutions to get after.

It always seems that weightloss falls near the top of the list for us ladies.  So, it's time to get out the scale and assess the situation.  Pick a morning sometime soon and make a date with the scale, preferably before diving into your morning coffee and after a sweat-laden cardio workout!  Whatever you did or didn't eat or do, the scale will spit out a number accordingly.  Take ownership of whatever the number is, because right, wrong, or indifferent it's all you.  If you, like me, don't like what you see, now is a great time to work on changing it!  Get to the gym!  Not a gym-rat?  Sniff around your community for running, biking, or hiking groups.  I've found that most are more about the comraderie and less about serious competition.  Commit to a 5K in the Spring and pull a training schedule from the web; you can find ones for beginners to novices, generally for free!  I'm a huge fan of most of the Beachbody at-home workout programs, allowing me to literally roll out of bed, stumble into workout clothes, and knock out a class in my bedroom before I'm even fully awake!

It seems that the beginning of a new year marks a clean slate for the soul, too.  I'm blessed to be in the company of great ladies that support, challenge, encourage, and mentor me in endeavors ranging from business to athletic to parenting.  Over the past year, I have learned that the more of myself I put out there for them, they give me so much more in return.  I spent the last year learning so much more about myself through them, and I grew so much more because of them.  So, I'll be adding one more resolution to the list...to be the kind of friend a friend would like to have.

Here's to a wonderful 2013 of you doing your best for yourself, supermoms!  Cheers!

'Tis a Hazardous Holiday!

Do you feel what I feel?  Between endless holiday errand-running, lengthy to-do lists, and later nights at parties and functions, the season has me about wiped!  Sprinkle that with sneaking an extra Christmas cookie here and there and embibing additional glasses of red wine everywhere else, this supermom definitely is beginning to feel like she's been run over by the proverbial reindeer!  Do you feel what I feel?!!  Cheers to the holidays, supermoms!

Today I...

...had to sit back and take a deep breath and let motherhood just wreak havoc!  First, it was the baby getting a nasty stomach bug, then a water pipe bursting in the basement, followed by a trip to take an even sicker baby to the ER and then, finally, a short workday to rescue our preschool from my "strong-willed" child, who had been kicked out for the day.  Off to Ohio a day later for a quick visit with the in-laws, which really was fine, except for the head cold I picked up that left most meals tasteless from the congestion and my eyes so bloodshot and watery that I looked like I was recovering from last-night's rager most of the trip.  All the while, work has been piling up, and I'm already behind.  With all the hoopla, my new workout routine has barely had a chance to get off the ground, despite the fact that there seems to be no Christmas cookie out there that I can pass up.  I could just cry!  Actually, I think I have...

Sound familiar?  See, we're really not so different, supermoms.  There are more ties that bind us, as moms.  I think for us supermoms is that it's about getting back up and dusting off our capes, when motherhood tears us a new one, instead of remaining downtrodden.  It's about just hanging on sometimes and just rolling with it at others.  It's about realizing that all we can do is our best, eventhough that "best" may not look like what we were hoping for or even going for.  It's accepting that it's good enough that we tried our best, supermoms! 

Flight Delayers

Does it ever seem to you, supermoms, that for every step forward you take in reaching and stretching towards your dreams and goals that there's always someone watching from the sidelines just waiting for you to fall, happily ready to point out that they knew it wouldn't work or that you couldn't do it.  It's like the meer thought of you taking flight has them digging in their heels to watch for your fall.  It's unnerving, isn't it?  Those doubting looks and snickering, scoffing comments are like arrows shot straight into your core, weakening your confidence and eroding your courage to step outside of the box and take a risk.  Have you considered that that is exactly what these negative-nellies want?...to keep you tucked snugly in your little box...to maintain the status quo that provides them comfort and security, even if it means that you have to diminish yourself to conform to the box?

They are afraid of your cape catching wind, supermoms!  Their words are not a commentary about you but are a reflection of their fears of seeing you fly.  Look for your inspiration and support from somewhere else than the naysayers, because they are doing nothing but clipping your wings, and you deserve to soar!

High Brow Indeed

Oh, yes, even this supermom can lose track of some of those "little" things on my to-do list!  I was checking my look in the mirror the other day and leaned in closer to inspect my growing colletion of fine lines, when I noticed my brows.  Holy heck, can you say brow wax...STAT!  My to-do list has been so totally under control, at least where the kids and the house were concerned!  Don't you hate when that happens?  A classic reminder that I have been so busy handling them and work and some other obligations that I had forgotten to circle back and check-in with Mommy's To Do List.  Since I've jammed up my schedule with all kinds of other things, I've been self-conciously wandering just knowing I have a full-blown hayfield up there and trying to figure out a way to squeeze in an appointment to rectify the situation!...trying to find some time to take care of myself.  Ha, I'm sure you understand and have been there, too.  It's one of those common ties that bind us moms together, no matter our background, parenting style, number of kids, age, etc...we have these common threads, supermoms!

Simple As...

So, I'm off like a shot, working towards my new goals by working my daily "plan" of exercise... nicely spelled out in a beginner 1/2 marathon training schedule calendar (you can find them free online, by the way)...and healthy eating with help from my calorie counter. As one of the recent Biggest Loser contestants would say, over and over, "it's one day at a time, one meal, one decision". If you read about goal-setting, it talks about focusing on all these little things that can get you where you wanna go, so that you're not totally overwhelmed with how to get to the finish line. Sometimes, for me, it's even staying in the moment to finish an interval strong or make it to the top of the hill I'm chugging up or run just that last, agonizing 10th of a mile. I do what they say...try to turn the negative chatter that comes on, when I'm struggling or pushing myself to my limits. The "I can't do this", "this is too hard", "I'm so out of shape", "I don't want to do this", "this isn't for me, and I knew it", and "I suck". Of course, there's the obvious slogans of "just do it" or Tom Hanks' line in A League of Their Own of "it's the hard that makes it good", and I always have a library of clips from songs that I can dial into..."stop, collaborate, and listen" from Vanilla Ice is a favorite...why, I don't know, but it definitely distracts me from my misery. I generally back that up with some positive affirmations that I love, just the thinking about and remembering seeming to get me through the hard moments. Some of my faves come from P90X's Tony Horton: "do your best and forget the rest" and "just keep pressing play".

Now, all that's great for rallying your self-motivation, I know. But, given that I have a potty-training resistant toddler and an exclusively-nursed new baby, my mental game can wane in its strength and dedication. So, you think about all the external motivators like keeping your health, living a long life, doing it for your kids, blah, blah, blah. Then, sometimes the reasons just come to you, as to why it is so important to hold onto and care for "you". One of those reasons was staring me in the face this morning. It was catching a quick glimpse of a couple pairs of new shoes, as I booked into my closet to frantically get dressed. You know the kind...found generally at teeny-bopper stores...sparkly, blingy, or patterened in some zippy design? Ah, yes, those shoes that channel my inner youthful spirit...the shoes that reflect the inner energy that I know I have...the shoes that just scream "me"! Looking at them boistered my weary mind and put a bounce in my dragging step, reminding me of who I am and refocusing me on what I'm trying to do. Sometimes, I guess, your motivators can be just as simple as that.

What simple items do you find that suprisingly motivate you?

Resolutions Revisited

Hello, my lovelies, and a happy mid-March greeting to you! Why so perky, you ask? Other than the fact that this week has seen a streak of mid-60s and warmer temps, sunny days, longer evenings, and the rechristening of several of my pairs of flip-flops (my poor, swollen feet are grateful!)? Well, it is mid-March, after all...a full month after many people have completely dropped their New Year's resolutions and are back to life as they know it. According to studies, most of us ditch our resolutions by February 16th...ahem, this happen to you? Or, are you one of the few that has made it?!!

At the beginning of the year, we talked about a few new ways to change up your eating habits and some different options for hitting your exercise goals that didn't rely on having a gym membership. Did you commit to trying any of them? Are you still trying? If you've fallen off your own bandwagon, why? My theories for "why" include boredom, lack of accountability, less than stellar support, no clear goals (this vague, "I wanna be skinny" or "I don't want to be fat" is what I mean...sounds great but how do you get there?), and no reward system in place. Or, maybe you do have one in place that involves rewarding attendance at a kickboxing class with a Qdoba burrito sans cheese (yeah, right!) with a side of chips and queso! This was a CLASSIC post-workout meal for me, in my early days. Of course, all I did was basically wipe-out all the benefits of the exercise I'd just done with the calories and fat I shoveled in my face. So, move away from treating yourself with an extra helping of dinner or a Dairy Queen Blizzard and find something else that will keep you motivated and excited to hit your resolution goals. Some ideas involve some cash outlay like a mani/pedi treatment or a shopping spree for a new summer dress. Some can be as simple as fitting back into a favorite pair of jeans or being able to comfortably toddle after your toddler at the park. If it just has to be food, pick a weekday to treat yourself to a lunch splurge or have a weekend day like family pizza night as a predesignated splurge for hitting your eating and exercise goals.

My reward system can be best summarized by the pictures below:

I LOVE coats! The black marks a non-spendy reward...I just wanna fit back into it! It was a newer purchase, after I'd hit my weightloss goals, and I couldn't believe it fit, when I tried it on. It was on clearance, so there were no other sizes available...the fact that it is so small and fit...it was like it was meant just for me! The second is also a clearance rack coat that I found, while in my first trimester of pregnancy. This coat just screams my name, and although I coulda started wearing it, unzipped of course, I chose to save it as a later reward for losing my baby weight. Both are hung in my coat closet, where they beckon to me. They are a visible and very concrete reminder of what awaits me, when I reach my goals. They are a reminder to make the choice to get out to walk, even when I'd rather slum on the couch...they come to mind, when I'm staring longingly at a brownie, steering me and my sweet tooth to fruit, a bowl of cereal, or a yogurt.

If you've lost your New Year's resolution mojo, keep checking back here for help and ideas. But, evaluate your goals, break them down into small and big steps, then dangle some concrete rewards out there for yourself. Heck, share them here, if you'd like! Then, get back up on your bandwagon and get after it!

To Vegan or Not To Vegan

To build off of my last post, featuring a friend and fellow blogger that completed a 30-day vegan cleanse, I wanted to talk more about the vegan part of the equation.

I thought it was super timely that Oprah hosted a show focused on veganism and offered a week-long vegan challenge to her staff. One of her guests was Kathy Freston, known as The Veganist. I tuned in to learn more, as I've been mulling over trying my own vegan cleanse, after the baby is born. Why, I'm not so sure (and, neither is my Hubby), other than wanting to clean out my system in a healthy way...maybe to get on the vegan bandwagon for a bit...definitely to infuse our diets with more clean-food options!

The gist I got from the show, and I'm paraphrasing and summarizing all over the place here (for more details, go to http://www.oprah.com/showinfo/Oprah-and-378-Staffers-Go-Vegan-The-One-Week-Challenge) is that the goal was to get us, us being us people that consume about 10 billion animals per year, to be more concious about where our food comes from and what is in it. It was mentioned that we eat what we eat out of habit, cultural values and traditions...or, and I believe this to be frighteningly true, because we have become addicted to it. Obesity stats and its impact on our health system were brought up, as was our love of salty, sugary, and fried foods. Veganism and the idea of eating foods with clean ingredients flies in the face of that, for sure, but is an idea that I wish more of us would get on board with.

What I learned was that animal products are used everywhere, even in places I wouldn't expect. I had no idea how much we really relied on them, until I started reading labels on items in my own kitchen: cereals, salad dressings, pop tarts. I listened closely to Kathy's product substitutions for vegan versions of condiments like butter and mayo that I could try. I thought of ways to avoid eating meat or just eating seafood, so frantic was I to save the animals! And, then, she brought me back to reality with two very simple statements: veganism is a way to honor animals, instead of taking from them to feed our appetites, and, it offers us a higher experience, as humans. Um, okay? How much do dairy cows miss their milk? Do hens bond with their eggs to the point that they miss them, if we take them away?

I mulled all this over for a couple of days, trying to find an answer to what all this meant...how I could be a better consumer and more responsible member of the human race, if you will. After all, being that we happily own and drive two large SUVs and exclusively use disposable diapers, I am very aware of the extra-large carbon footprint my family is leaving, despite our almost obsessive recycling efforts. What I decided to take away from all of this was that eating meat is NOT a crime, but the process of our food being so processed is becoming one! What I CAN do is be more respectful of the process of getting it to my plate, by wielding my consumer might to support companies that invest in a clean and humane way of delivering it to the market. What I CAN do is get behind companies that support product integrity, instead of those that fluff their foods with additives and preservatives. What if we, as consumers and spenders of the almighty dollar, started to demand a little more? What if we became more aware and more vigilant? As Oprah, who readily admitted to not being ready to go vegan at all, noted...what would it look like if we just leaned a little...became veganish?

Let the Battle Rage

Finally! Our representatives have grown a pair and have drawn a line in the sand against the fast food industry, on our behalf. In a nearly unanimous vote by city officials, fast food operators in San Francisco can no longer give away toys in kid's meals, unless they meet certain standards...much higher than what these restaurants currently hold for themselve...in sodium, fat, sugar, fruit, vegetable, beverage, and caloric content. As expected, the push back has already started. McDonald's whining about the "happy" being taken away from the Happy Meal. Opponents crying discrimination and stating that the city is overstepping. Parents defending the toys AND the meals. Seriously?

What I see is a city that is tired of watching its citizens slowly killing themselves and their children, because of a dollar menu or senior discounts or toy give-aways. It knows we have become powerless against these gimicks and that we can no longer be trusted to help ourselves. It knows the fiscal costs it will pay in obesity complications, if it let us continue poisoning ourselves and our children. I think this city also knows that the fast food industry is capable of so much more than the junk it offers, when push comes to shove...we, the public, have just not been strong enough to do this for ourselves. So, I say welcome battle, because we have nothing to lose but really unhealthy food. Hopefully, this battle for change will rage across the nation sooner rather than later and the victory will be so sweet for all of us!

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2010/11/02/MN111G5PCN.DTL

Killing Us Softly

I heard a commercial, on the radio, for yet another one of those quick-fix weightloss programs. Having basically tuned it out, my brain drifting off to another topic..probably my To Do list for the day..I was instantly dialed back into the commercial, when I heard this, "finally, a diet that won't kill you!" Kill you? A diet? There are a lot of things that diets are (challenging, disheartening, life-changing, etc.), but I didn't think they were something that could kill you, restrictive or not. I thought it was those few extra pounds or so that we hide under baggy shirts, stuff into fitted bodyshapers, or ignore all together, in complete denial, that were the problem? With over 30% of women in this country qualifying for their very own costly membership in the obesity club, I thought it had become more than obvious what would be killing us...

A Life of Servitude

Okay, so you're a mom...you love those kids and are totally dedicated to them and would do anything for them. And, shouldn't one of those things include taking excellent care of one of the most important people in their lives? Yes, I'm talking about YOU, my dear!

Motherhood is one of the most cherished, demanding, and respected roles we'll play. Raising those kids requires so much of us, but it does NOT require our complete enslavement to their wants, demands, and schedules. It certainly does not require that we put ourselves and our lives on the backburner. We are in a much more esteemed class than to fall into the trap of "I never have enough time for myself, because I have to do this, this, this and this for my kids". Bologne, my friend! You are their MOTHER! I would argue that it is vitally important that one of your very top priorities is loving and caring for that person...you...that one of the very best gifts you can give those kids that you love and adore and would-do-anything-for is a mother who loves, respects, and cares for herself.